Banishing Self-Critical Talk
Join The Club
I'm thinking about starting a club; a recovery program for self-critics. I'm tempted to just leave it at that because if you are a self-critic then you know what I'm talking about and I can feel you nodding your head right now.
When I work with a client and they set a goal, one of the exercises we sometimes do is to imagine what it will look and feel like when the goal is achieved. Feel free to play along here as I sketch what it would be like to be a recovered self-critic.
To start, it probably means spending more time celebrating the accomplishments you've achieved and less time, a lot less time, counting the things you haven't. Imagine just falling asleep at night, feeling all content and happy about what you did that day, not needing check your ever growing list of things that still need to be done in order to keep ahead. You would immediately see the effort and intention that you commit to your work and family and be filled with pride and fulfillment. And, you wouldn't let the ideal of perfection stand in the way of recognizing and celebrating the progress you've achieved.
"It's not the load that weighs you down, it's the way you carry it." - C.S. Lewis
In this Club we can practice the steps to recovery together. It's the Club against the one self-critic inside you (all of us)!
Here are some tips for how to begin:
1. Take a few minutes each day to list your accomplishments. You can do this at the beginning or the end of each day. Just list 2 or 3 things that you are proud you accomplished that day or the day before. Try to keep your mind from jumping to the things that are still on your to-do list (this takes loads of practice).
2. Create a new, proud, voice to help squeeze out the self-critic. When you are reviewing your proud accomplishments mentally recognize the effort, time and energy that went into getting there and tell yourself that you are proud and give yourself a moment to feel fulfilled. The only way to quite a self-critical voice is to add in a louder, prouder voice.
3. Share some of your accomplishments with someone (or even a few other people) and accept any praise or acknowledgement that you are given. As self-critics, we tend to downplay compliments and thanks. Practice taking them as they are given and letting them soak in. All you need to say in reply is, "thank you". Leave all the, "yeah, but..." responses left unsaid.
As we practice these beginner steps to diminishing our inner self-critic, we have to remember that negative internal dialog is a habit we've built which now we can rebuild into something more positive.
Whose with me? Message me if you want to be part of the Club!
Beyond Coaching is Two
This month we are celebrating our 2nd anniversary. Oh where has time gone?
The traditional gift for a 2 year anniversary is cotton (yes, really. No idea how these things were decided).
There are so many people who encouraged and supported me both during my decision-making process as well as I launched. It is such a gift when you have the opportunity to see yourself through other people's eyes, especially when they see your strengths.
I also want to express my gratitude and appreciation to each and every one of my clients who trusted me to coach you though to a higher level of success, happiness and fulfillment. It is such a pleasure to weave our journeys together.
Explore the possibilities over a virtual coffee
If you're curious about what success coaching can bring to you Schedule a virtual coffee and let's chat.
We will set aside 45-minutes to explore what your goals are and I'll share my philosophy and practice style. The session is complimentary and allows you to experience some coaching first hand and determine if we might be a good fit.
The link allows you to view my calendar and pick a time that works best for you. Move Beyond your current challenges and step into 2021 poised for a new level of success.
If you are enjoying Beyond A Pep Talk please share with friends and suggest they sign up! Also, I'd love to hear what you want to learn more about so that I can create content just for you. Email me at Ricki@TransitionBeyond.com with your thoughts, comments or just to share a chuckle.